Close checkbook on daughter's 'independence'
Spokesman Review, The (Spokane)

Close checkbook on daughter's 'independence' annie's mailbox

KATHY MITCHELL MARCY SUGAR

Reader feels that by giving daughter money, he's sending message that it's OK for her to be living with boyfriend.

Creators Syndicate

Dear Annie: I am a 54-year-old father of two children: a daughter who is in her fifth year of college and an older son. My wife recently returned to school and is not working. I've borrowed money for the past six years to cover everyone's tuition, but it is becoming increasingly difficult to pay the bills at the end of the month.

We allowed our daughter, "Marla," to go out of state to school to be near a boyfriend who ended up living overseas. We finally moved her back home because we could not afford the out-of-state tuition and living expenses. Marla has a new boyfriend and has been staying with him. Meanwhile, I am borrowing money to pay for an apartment she doesn't use and a car she "simply can't do without." She has a part- time job and a small college loan, but we still end up sending money to cover unexpected expenses or pay off a credit card.

I do not approve of Marla living with her boyfriend and have asked her to move back to her apartment. She says she's an adult now and should be free to make her own decisions. I feel that by providing financial support, I am encouraging her to behave in a way I disapprove of.